There’s a rumor going around the Rose City that for the remainder of the 2004 basketball season, after the National Anthem is played at Blazer home games, fans will be asked to remain standing while Neal Sedaka’s “Breaking Up Is Hard To Do” is piped over the public address system.

First, it was Brittany and Justin who split the sheet, then J-Lo and Ben who parted ways, with the matter of the huge diamond engagement ring still up in the air, and after 43 years, the mainstays of the Mattel toy company, Barbie and Ken have gone their separate ways.

Now our own Cheech and Chong are no longer an item.

I’m not talking about the scruffy pair who starred in “Nice Dreams”, one of them Rae Dawn’s father and the other Don Johnson’s partner in crime-solving, I’m referring to Your Portland Trailblazers, Cheech Stoudamire and Rasheed Chong.

Yes, Blazer management finally sent the senior member of the duo packing after seven-and-a-half glorious years wearing the red and black while bringing fame, fortune and notoriety to the city of Portland.

My man Rasheed, who had an NBA-record 41 technical fouls during the 2000-01 season and served a seven-game suspension, (also a league record), for attacking a referee after a game in January 2003 is no more.

Darn, what are sports columnists like myself and Brian Meehan from The Oregonian gonna do for anecdotes and entertaining copy to keep our readers amused?

Wasn’t it just last week when the media in the Portland area reported how some of Chong’s teammates thought he was too good to be traded? Apparently his talent must have gone south in the past seven days or so, which probably justifies the deal with Atlanta, which sent him and Wesley Person to the Hawks in exchange for Shareef Abdur-Rahim, Theo Ratliff and Dan Dickau. My, my, how times do change so rapidly!

Fan response to the deal has been positive. I mean, who wants to spend a ton of money to attend a home game with the family and then listen to fans boo the home-town team when the starting lineup is announced? That doesn’t make a whole lot of sense to me.

The trade will cost the Blazers an additional $20 million in salary this season but, hey, who can put a price on happiness?

Player response to the deal? Well – it was about what you’d expect.

Dale Davis, another Blazer with his fair share of problems both on and off the court, remarked Wallace was a “super guy” to be around and a super guy to play with. “He’s the type of guy that has your back at all times,” Davis reportedly said.

Okay, maybe I’d want someone to “have my back” if I found myself involved in a fight in the “hood,” but I’d rather have a teammate who wanted to be just that – a teammate on the court or on the playing field. Someone who’d put the good of the team ahead of lighting up joint while being chauffeured back from a game or threatening to go blows with a referee because he had the audacity to call a foul. Someone who’d can the surly attitude and talk to reporters after a game without whining and complaining about what everyone else was doing wrong. Someone who’d be more interested in his teammates rather than who “CTC.” That’s what Wallace told a group of reporters during an interview. “If you don’t know what CTC means, that’s Cut the Check!”

Then we had Ruben Patterson’s comment about how he was “shocked” when the deal went down.

Shocked? Apparently somebody must have been beating on Patterson’s head, instead of him beating on his wife, and he hasn’t read the newspaper for awhile.

Ruben: Ah duh, management has been trying to unload Chong for the past couple of months! Where you been, man?

The trade will supposedly reenergize the franchise, put fans back in the stands and give the team a whole new outlook on life. Sorta like “Sunshine, Lollypops and Roses,” and the new Blazers have reportedly been talking about faith, family, how actions represent the team and the value of character.

Okay, I can buy into that. Still the name of the game is winning and until the “Ws” begin piling up, this sports editor will remain skeptical regarding Portland’s return to glory.

In the interim, I’m going to have to find some other sports figure about whom I can pen amusing columns for the entertainment of my readers. But hark, all is not lost! The latest information is Tonya Harding has given up her boxing career, such as it was, (a boxer with a 3-2 record should probably seek other employment, or at least put it on hold and returned to the ice.) The infamous “Trailer Park Cutie” is more muscular than she was the last time she trained on the rink at the Lloyd Center so she should be able to fling hubcaps farther, and maybe a stint as an Olympic discus thrower is in her future. She has to do something that will pay the bills.

At any rate, bless you young lady!